She watched it closely as the waves crashed on the shore. I took off her shoes and socks, which made her nervous, the sand was chilly but not too bad, not for the baby who loves being outside, even in the frigid cold. She walked toward the waves, she was so curious, watching the waves roll through the surface moving her way. As soon as the water touched her toes she lost it! She couldn't even look at the water for about 30 minutes after that. She wanted nothing more to do with the water for the rest of the visit.
I know this will pass as she grows and develops an understanding of the powerful water source. I know she felt its energy and realized it was alive and moving on its own, unlike any water she has witnessed before. I never would have guessed this outcome.
She was however, very interested in the sand though. Picking it up and watching it slowly pour out of her hand all over her clothes. She would watch it pile up on her legs, then brush it off. She loved pushing her hands into the grains of sand and watch them disappear and then reappear when she lifted them out. Her own version of peek-a-boo. It was fascinating to see her explore with sand. I'm so happy to witness these moments of discovery.
We took her to the beach, all bundled up in a down coat and a hat. The wind was blowing gently and the birds were enjoying the goodies they found on the shore. Mazi stayed close to her Dad and I. Trying to chase the birds she would fall and as soon as she hit the sand, her arms would lift. Not wanting to touch the grainy new earth she discovered. Sometimes, I feel like Mazi gets bothered when her hands are dirty. She loves washing her hands and she always tells us when her hands are gooey. So funny from a girl who loves dirt. Looking for sea shells wasn't too exciting to her, she lost interest quickly and focused more on chasing the birds, they brought much more fun.
I simply enjoyed listening to the wind try and tell me how this new year should feel. Being around my beautiful partner and my adorable child was enough for me. Just walking on the beach brought a bit more clarity. I still don't know what I'm doing but I did come up with some New Year resolutions that I believe I can handle.
1.practice yoga everyday-even if it's just the MDR (minimum daily requirement) or some floor meditation I will get it in everyday!!! My practice deserves this and I know it will help my soul.
2.love more-everything, especially myself. I know this makes life better.
3.desire less-my heart is full of desires, so many that I think it creates so much hardship in my mind. I truly have the best parts of life and the rest is just tasty because it dangles in my face everyday but if I can overcome my list of desires I feel like I can find so much more contentment for my place in this life. It's a good place but I often feel a lack. A lack of family, friends, community, my own home, lack of myself, time blah blah blah. This is silly. I have everything i truly need. I need to start thinking that I am just on a vacation from ME, so I can be fully present for MY family. Whom I will practice loving even more this year.
The week was very awakening on many levels. I didn't spend the passing year with my Mr. Peek or my family but I learned to love another one.
I was staring at the face of my sleeping angel as the year turned.
I am still alive and I am still growing and learning so much. The Earth is a magical place and speaks so clearly if we can just listen more. One of the days while I was walking the beach with Mazi, the ocean was perfectly still, no waves, no breeze, silence. It was quiet and I know I was paying attention to the message. The Earth, in all the chaos that is reaping on her surface and in her skies, is still at peace, at peace with what is going on around her, positive, negative, no matter what she is at peace and can find stillness. I too can follow the example presented to me from the Divine. Stillness and peace will flood my heart too.