Slow Down People!!!

Visiting Utah brings on such interesting feelings. I am so drawn to this place because of its majestic mountains, it's dry deserts, it's yummy restaurants and my family and friends...of course. However, there is such a strange culture here, past the large population of Mormons, I can handle them.  The religion is understandable to me and I respect it.  So much of this culture is obsessed with money, vanity and social status. So much so that when I return home I feel the speed of everyone's energy and I become almost dizzy.  Success of business and money is all around me...suppressed economy? Not for the Utah folk. Younger and younger people are making big money and the gyms are as numbered as the churches, on every corner and packed full of sweaty bodies with perfect hair, makeup and the latest gym wear.  It's an incredibly difficult place to keep up with since it moves so fast and is all about the latest trend that everyone must have. Including the newest sport equipment on the market...how does one stay present in such speed and extreme consumerism??  I feel the push it all has on me and it makes me feel like I'm drowning. 

Those mountains I see in the background of this Utah Valley carry my soul and my backbone to this life. I find solitude, inspiration and strength when I scale across the rough terrain. On bike, foot, or even a pair of skiis. I long to breathe that dry air and feel the breeze on my face.  The wilderness here is my temple and I feel so close to God when I visit it.  But the pace of the valley people still makes me feel like I'm spinning out if control.  I went jogging this morning and my mind raced to dark places of dissconnection and frustration. Luckily a nice yoga class at 3B yoga helps to take it all away as I drift off into the deep places of my body and release this tension and discontent.  How do all these mothers give their children all that their children need physically and emotionally while moving at such a fast pace and having their hands in so many projects?? I can barely hit up a yoga class while giving my lil toddler all she needs and I do believe I'm giving her all she desires of me since she is in my arms every time she wants it.

She knows she can trust me. So why then do I feel like I'm being left behind? Why do I feel stagnant when I have such an important job?  Sometimes being awake and sensitive makes things confusing and hard. This culture this American culture is exhausting!!!!

I need to sleep like this baby!!!